More Thoughts From Me #136: Dear @DragonQuest

I have been playing Dragon Quest 8 a bit lately. I’ve also been playing Dragon Quest Builders. Not Dragon Quest 11 though, since I don’t have a Playstation 4 (sigh). And there is one thing thats been bothering me. I just had to talk about this. So the following is an open letter to the Dragon Quest twitter account and to all the new Dragon Quest fans!

Dear @DragonQuest,

Something has been bothering me lately. No its not my lack of Dragon Quest 11 and a Playstation 4. Ok, yes, that has been bothering me. But thats not what this letter is about. No, I wanted to write to you about something far more important!

You see, I’ve been playing a lot of Dragon Quest lately. And there’s something that I have to get off my chest…

Metal Slimes.

I love metal slimes. Those things are cute and wonderful and…I want to destroy each and every one of them. I need the experience points. You understand right? But its not guilt thats forcing me to write this letter…

You see, I feel that new players, people who are just starting with Dragon Quest 11, need to understand something.

Metal Slimes are addictive.

You see a metal slime and you say to your self, ” Self. You can do this. Beat this metal slime and you’ll get a bunch of experiance points.”

For the new Dragon Quest player, hey, keep an eye out for metal slimes. Those suckers will get you leveled up in no time at all. That is…

IF YOU CAN CATCH THEM.

Metal Slimes, you see, have a habit of running off. Your party members will only do one point of damage to them. Maybe. Metal Slimes like to dodge too. So Metal Slimes only have three or four hit points. If you can hit them enough, you can defeat them and net a bunch of experiance points.

IF.

Thats a pretty big if.

Recently I was playing Dragon Quest 8 on the 3DS. I found a perfect spot to find metal slimes. I was going back and forth between the area, waiting for metal slimes to appear. They kept appearing and…

THEY KEPT RUNNING AWAY!!!

Ok, I did manage to get a metal slime once and awhile…

But frustration started to set in. I wanted to throw my 3DS. Finally I realized, its time to move on. I need to continue the main story. So I left the metal slime section. And yet…

I keep thinking about those metal slimes. Should I go back? Should I just wait until I see some more? I know there are other places and other types of Metal Slimes…

And listen folks. Metal slimes are in ALL of the Dragon Quest games (yes even Dragon Quest Builders). You can’t avoid these things. They can avoid you but you can’t avoid them.

So you’ve all been warned. Please spread the word @DragonQuest twitter. Metal Slimes are addictive. Metal Slimes will haunt you in your dreams…

Sincerely,

Daniel Fugate

@df2506

Dragon Quest Fan

Next week: Did we have a Nintendo Direct? Are we still waiting? I’ll have something Nintendo Direct related in my next column!

More Thoughts From Me is an opinon column. The thoughts expressed here are mine and mine alone. I really wish I was playing Dragon Quest 11 right now.